You’ve Put Conditions on Your Happiness, but You Don’t Have To · Letter #17
You’ve Put Conditions on Your Happiness, but You Don’t Have To
Hey friend,
There was a time in my life when I felt like happiness was something unattainable. No matter what I did to move towards it, happiness always escaped my grasp.
I thought to myself I’ll be happy when I get another job or buy a house, or even get married. There was always something to achieve before arriving at a state where everything was perfect and blissful.
Without my awareness, I had put a condition on my happiness. I had accepted that I couldn’t attain it until I accomplished a certain goal or things were a certain way.
People speak about the things they need to get done to live their ‘dream life’ and finally be happy. It was Albert Einstein who said, “If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, (not to people or things).”
Happiness, however, is not something you arrive at. It is always here.
The moment you put a condition on happiness based on a future goal, you immediately set yourself up for disappointment. You might accomplish your goal, but there will always be something else to achieve. Worse, if fate conspires to make your goal ultimately unreachable, your dream life will come crashing down, dragging your happiness along with it.
Most of us have a story in our heads that holds us hostage to what could be experienced right now. We say “I’m unhappy because […]”. Whatever follows ‘because’ in that sentence is obscuring the joy and equanimity that can be found at this very moment.
Happiness is right here—you can only think otherwise.
None of this is to mean that goals and achievements are delusory, but it does mean that joy doesn’t depend on them. The story in our heads makes it seem like it does.
This very moment of existence, this one breath, is enough to reveal all the happiness you could ever desire.
Don’t let the stories in your head—your thoughts and desires—stop you from seeing what is already here. Happiness exists prior to any thought. You don’t have to think about it, you only have to feel it.
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Thank you for reading,
Chris
Edge of Insight by Chris Basha
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